Time to rekindle your relationship? When you first meet your partner, everything seems new and exciting. You have that delicious feeling in the pit of your tummy, and your heart beats much faster. You can’t stop looking at the other person, and they seem to be just perfect. This is looking at the world through rose coloured glasses.
You will overlook the little annoying things the other person does, if in fact you notice at all. However, after time, once the glamour of the relationship starts to thin a little, the nagging often starts, and instead of hearing, “You look beautiful,” or “You look great in that outfit”, you might hear something like: “Why are you wearing that dress?” If this has happened in your relationship, first, the two of you need to sit down and be honest that things might have changed a little. Perhaps one of you is going through a stressful time and hasn’t effectively communicated that to the other partner. It is better to be upfront and honest as soon as the hairline fractures start to appear. Often it is beneficial to remember what attracted you to the person at the beginning of the relationship, and concentrate on the positive aspects of the relationship, rather than on the annoying things.
This is when the real work starts in a relationship, and the truth is, both of you will have to work at this. Often, it will not be easy, but it is possible to rekindle the passion in your relationship. You see, we all have the vital life force constantly flowing through us as living energies that contain ideas and information, and, depending on your compatibility, your partner’s ideas may be totally different to yours.
The way we express these energies is through specific patterns of instinctual behavior, or thought processes. These energies work through the forces that make up the impersonal part of humanity’s psyche that all of us share. When they particularize, we call them archetypes. For example, if I say to you, “Oh, she is the perfect mother.” You know exactly what I mean. She is living out the mother archetype. These archetypes automatically project themselves outwardly from within us onto whatever or whoever is available in our outer world.
For example, the person we like or dislike instantly, a fondness or antipathy for birds, cats, dogs or horses, a peace-inducing picture of an angel, perhaps a favourite print or a certain piece of sculpture. Each of these images acts as a screen for the archetypal forces that live within us, and project out of us onto anything that will act as a screen to project back to us what we need to become aware of, whether that be an inanimate object or a person.
This archetypal energy can mold and change our behavior, even shaping certain structures of our lives, but are often unknown as the energy functions just beneath the level of personality awareness. In each human being these energies gather into in an individual and unique pattern. So this is the energy that causes fluctuations and change in our relationships and can also rekindle them. These processes are unknown to our personalities, and are one of the main causes of trouble in a relationship. You can sometimes witness an archetype taking over someone’s personality, for example, when that person becomes inebriated and acts like someone other than their normal waking self.
It is imperative to be informed about such matters if your relationship is a bit shaky, and you want to rekindle your relationship so it can move to a different level. Sometimes you need to begin again and capture the initial excitement. The secret is kindness and compassion for each other.
There is a lot of information I will be writing about concerning archetypes, projections, temperaments, the inner child, the personality, consciousness, unconsciousness and so on.
Watch out for tomorrows post on ‘Time Management’